That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
okay pat passed out under dana's car
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
