last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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