walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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