never play flip cup with pint glasses
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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