you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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