Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
