I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
