Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
