quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Randomize
