You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
