so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize