I am puke
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
