Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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