his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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