I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
