She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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