Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
