the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
