brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
