You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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