I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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