Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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