Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Randomize