I just made out with a guy for $7.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
