I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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