I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Randomize
