Me. At least after what I've been through.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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