**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize