so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Randomize
