i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
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