And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
