A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize
