Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
