Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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