STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
