I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
