she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
My ass is underappreciated
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
