well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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