The maid of honor just puked.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Randomize
