Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
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