After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize