A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
So squirting runs in the family.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
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