She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
