Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
