So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
