are you still at the devil's house?
dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize