what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
