his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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