That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
