yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Randomize
