chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
